Official Mens' Room

[apezza]

Evening lads,

i’m sitting here tonight trying as best I can to enjoy the Christmas period but I am finding it a tad difficult. On Christmas Eve, my wife who suffers from anxiety and depression, began to have symptoms of her anxiety returning. While she is normally used to this with the medication that she takes, this time it has not worked. For the past few days, her anxiety has been the worst I’ve ever seen.

She has not been able to eat properly or sleep and has wept uncontrollably for the past few days. She has had some awful thoughts and for the first time ever she’s admitted to me that the strongest of these thoughts is wanting to die. There is nothing that we know of that triggers all this, she holds a very responsible job as the Executive Assistant to the CEO of St John Ambulance. As you can imagine there is a lot of pressure in this job but she handles it brilliantly throughout the year. She does have some small periods of anxiety through the year but the medication she takes keeps it at bay.

Because most medical places have been closed, we have only been able to start to consult doctors today. Her GP sent her to Sutherland hospital today to get the help she needs and she has been admitted tonight.

This is all very scary at the moment as I said before this is the worst it has ever been. I know a lot of you on here aren't religious and that’s fair enough, but if you could send some positive vibes and prayers my way that would be wonderful.

P s. Not sure if my prayers will help. It took 30 of praying before finally winning the GF. Mind you there was also 30 years of cursing so maybe they cancelled each other out!

 

[Flanno]

Evening lads,

i’m sitting here tonight trying as best I can to enjoy the Christmas period but I am finding it a tad difficult. On Christmas Eve, my wife who suffers from anxiety and depression, began to have symptoms of her anxiety returning. While she is normally used to this with the medication that she takes, this time it has not worked. For the past few days, her anxiety has been the worst I’ve ever seen.

She has not been able to eat properly or sleep and has wept uncontrollably for the past few days. She has had some awful thoughts and for the first time ever she’s admitted to me that the strongest of these thoughts is wanting to die. There is nothing that we know of that triggers all this, she holds a very responsible job as the Executive Assistant to the CEO of St John Ambulance. As you can imagine there is a lot of pressure in this job but she handles it brilliantly throughout the year. She does have some small periods of anxiety through the year but the medication she takes keeps it at bay.

Because most medical places have been closed, we have only been able to start to consult doctors today. Her GP sent her to Sutherland hospital today to get the help she needs and she has been admitted tonight.

This is all very scary at the moment as I said before this is the worst it has ever been. I know a lot of you on here aren't religious and that’s fair enough, but if you could send some positive vibes and prayers my way that would be wonderful.

All the best Chad, I’m sure it’s very difficult for you as well but you seem like a top bloke so she is lucky to have you around and supporting her. As others have said look after yourself as well, that’s important.

EA to CEO certainly would be a very stressful, highly skilled job. I know you’ve mentioned there is nothing that triggers it in particular, but has she always had an EA to CEO position / stressful job? If she transitioned into a job not quite as stressful, is that something that could help the situation?

I know that’s all easier said than done and I don’t know your family’s personal circumstances, so I’m sorry if I sound a bit naive with it all, just putting some thoughts from an outsider out there.

 

[MrDravid]

Evening lads,

i’m sitting here tonight trying as best I can to enjoy the Christmas period but I am finding it a tad difficult. On Christmas Eve, my wife who suffers from anxiety and depression, began to have symptoms of her anxiety returning. While she is normally used to this with the medication that she takes, this time it has not worked. For the past few days, her anxiety has been the worst I’ve ever seen.

She has not been able to eat properly or sleep and has wept uncontrollably for the past few days. She has had some awful thoughts and for the first time ever she’s admitted to me that the strongest of these thoughts is wanting to die. There is nothing that we know of that triggers all this, she holds a very responsible job as the Executive Assistant to the CEO of St John Ambulance. As you can imagine there is a lot of pressure in this job but she handles it brilliantly throughout the year. She does have some small periods of anxiety through the year but the medication she takes keeps it at bay.

Because most medical places have been closed, we have only been able to start to consult doctors today. Her GP sent her to Sutherland hospital today to get the help she needs and she has been admitted tonight.

This is all very scary at the moment as I said before this is the worst it has ever been. I know a lot of you on here aren't religious and that’s fair enough, but if you could send some positive vibes and prayers my way that would be wonderful.

Hey mate, went through something similar with my wife earlier in the year... had some sort of mental break and went down the anxiety/depression/suicidal thoughts rabbit hole. She went to the local hospital and after consulting with her GP was admitted to a mental health hospital for a 3 week program.

Was pretty brutal on me having to look after 3 young kids on my own, not knowing if they'd have their mother long term and I struggled at times. Thankfully for her, the program and some friends she is close to her helped immensely and she has improved, although it has been an ongoing process.

For a number of reasons, both linked to the above and additional too, this year has continued to be a tough one for me (I won't hijack your post and get into them though!). I've had some good friends/family members that have helped me at different times, but as a committed Christian, ultimately what has comforted me most during this last year is that:

*God is in control and has a plan.
*God is good and wants my eternal good.
*God promises to be with me through my sufferings.
*God sent Jesus to suffer on my behalf to save me from my biggest problem.

I'm praying these truths can be more real to you and that you can have some peace at this time, but also that your wife and you get the help you need and come out the other side happier and healthier than ever.

My advice, reach out to a couple of close mates who you can open up to. Talk to your minister who probably has some experience dealing with these things. As has already been mentioned, look after yourself and your son!

 

[Sir Chadley]

Thanks guys, your words of comfort are just what I need. I’m not surprised so many of you are also affected, it’s becoming more common these days. I see it in my job too with the kids I interview, I reckon 1 in 5 are taking medication for mental health.

One of the theories I’m hoping is right and will help is that my wife’s worse times seem to be when we’re on leave. I wonder if the body detects that she’s relaxed and her immune system drops making it easier for the anxiety to return. I really hope it’s that simple. We’re OK financially and happy with the people we are friends with socially and all we do, so to find the trigger is bloody hard.

 

[The Punisher]

@Sir Chadley only just saw your post..
Sending thoughts and best wishes the way of you and your family.
You've got support here if you need to talk or vent.
Cant imagine what you're going through but we're here anyway you need.

 

[egg]

Hey mate , hope your wife is on the mend and the anxiety is melting away .
Sending GOOD vibes , take care.

 

[Super Impose]

Hey Chad , Your post hits home with me as this is part of my families life as well .
You are right - it strikes from nowhere and at any time , we have found Christmas , milestones etc can be some sort of trigger .
We got through our most recent attack with increased psychology sessions and an increase in medication .
Not sure if these are options in your case but if as many of us can share information. , then all the better .
This is so common mate - you are not alone - so many of us are with you and know the pain .
Stay strong for her - all the best mate ..

 

[Shortfin Mako]

Hey Chad , Your post hits home with me as this is part of my families life as well .
You are right - it strikes from nowhere and at any time , we have found Christmas , milestones etc can be some sort of trigger .
We got through our most recent attack with increased psychology sessions and an increase in medication .
Not sure if these are options in your case but if as many of us can share information. , then all the better .
This is so common mate - you are not alone - so many of us are with you and know the pain .
Stay strong for her - all the best mate ..

I think holidays are definitely triggers.

I don't know - may be it's the fact that you are not as occupied and have time in your hands and that gives the brain to opportunity to over think, over analyze and go into over drive.

That is why I think we are generally OK even if we are working too hard and it is stressful. The brain just does not have the time to go and be on its own. At least that's my theory.

I wish to all of you and your loved ones a Happy New Year. I am sending as many positive thoughts as I can to all of you and mostly the ones that are in need. We never met, but if you ever need to talk or anything please reach out. Life is hard and it can be extremely cruel. The best we can do is to be there for each other.

 

[bort]

Evening lads,

i’m sitting here tonight trying as best I can to enjoy the Christmas period but I am finding it a tad difficult. On Christmas Eve, my wife who suffers from anxiety and depression, began to have symptoms of her anxiety returning. While she is normally used to this with the medication that she takes, this time it has not worked. For the past few days, her anxiety has been the worst I’ve ever seen.

She has not been able to eat properly or sleep and has wept uncontrollably for the past few days. She has had some awful thoughts and for the first time ever she’s admitted to me that the strongest of these thoughts is wanting to die. There is nothing that we know of that triggers all this, she holds a very responsible job as the Executive Assistant to the CEO of St John Ambulance. As you can imagine there is a lot of pressure in this job but she handles it brilliantly throughout the year. She does have some small periods of anxiety through the year but the medication she takes keeps it at bay.

Because most medical places have been closed, we have only been able to start to consult doctors today. Her GP sent her to Sutherland hospital today to get the help she needs and she has been admitted tonight.

This is all very scary at the moment as I said before this is the worst it has ever been. I know a lot of you on here aren't religious and that’s fair enough, but if you could send some positive vibes and prayers my way that would be wonderful.

Feel for you Chad
As seems far too common my wife also has anxiety issues and has experienced bad depression, especially a few years back.
Fairly on top of things for a while now without medication but keeping a simple routine definitely helps with that.

Sucks as partner there is very little you can do to help but be there for them and try and keep additional triggers/stressors at bay.

Wonder if routine changes like affected sleep or alcohol intake going up could have been triggers for your wife given the timing?
But then could be anything else too

 

[Sir Chadley]

Thanks again for all your comments guys, I’ve been totally blown away here by the messages of support. I can’t tell you how much that means to me at the moment and certainly helps me in trying to get through all this and do what’s best for my family.

I really want to thank those who sent me private messages and I’m sorry if there’s anyone I have not replied to or quoted your post, my sincere apologies if I haven’t done that. Please know that I am sincerely grateful to you all.

 

[apezza]

Thanks again for all your comments guys, I’ve been totally blown away here by the messages of support. I can’t tell you how much that means to me at the moment and certainly helps me in trying to get through all this and do what’s best for my family.

I really want to thank those who sent me private messages and I’m sorry if there’s anyone I have not replied to or quoted your post, my sincere apologies if I haven’t done that. Please know that I am sincerely grateful to you all.

What your message (and all the responses) shows is how many of us have real world struggles that we deal with on a daily basis.

It also shows the importance of this forum of being able to get a bit of respite by discussing our favourite team in the world, whilst at the same time being able to vent our feelings etc.

 

[Blue_Eyes84]

As much as we lose our cool over Cronulla results, It goes to show you how insignificant it is compared to the real world. All the best, @Sir Chadley!

 

[Six Again]

Hi Sir Chadley ,

Hope your wife is improving mate.

As we are individuals the triggers or causes can be varied but from my family experience a common component of the recovery seems to be regular excercise. It is also important to take care of yourself & understand the potential resources available .

If you are not already plugged into organisations like STRIDE & or Mental Health Carers NSW to keep up with info & resouces available then maybe check them out when you get a chance. It also helps to understand there are others experiencing something similar & finding a potential contact network.

 

[Western Sharkie]

@Sir Chadley
Sorry to hear mate
Anxiety can be very debilitating
I hope the stress of the season is now lifting and that she is feeling better about things and is on the improve.

 

[The Punisher]

It also shows the importance of this forum of being able to get a bit of respite by discussing our favourite team in the world, whilst at the same time being able to vent our feelings etc.

Think it also shows that despite personal differences and disagreements over footy, that when push comes to shove, we back one another up

 

[davetherave]

Thanks PS, especially the bold bit. While my wife is number one priority, I’ll make sure my son and I are good too.
It’s such a horrible disease, we both finished work last Friday so much looking forward to relaxing and enjoying ourselves. And this just struck out of the blue.

Chad please reach out if you need

 

[Sir Chadley]

Chad please reach out if you need

Thanks mate. We have had a better day today so there is some light at the end of the tunnel.

 

[Blue_Eyes84]

Happy New Year to the best supporters in the world. Up Up Cronulla.

 

[Flanno]

Happy new year to you all! With two kids under two, I’ll be tucked into bed pretty soon wishing everyone all the best for 2025

 

[G.H Shark]

To all, Happy New Year!

Just reflecting this year as a new comer, it seems alot of us faced some personal challenges, with that I hope the new year ushers in some triumphs for us all, unrelated to the Sharks.

Be strong for yourselves.